This is the world. This is my life. These are my words.

Archive for December, 2004|Monthly archive page

"p a r i s "

In Uncategorized on December 30, 2004 at 12:15

I’ve missed paris. We arrived on christmas night with no place to sleep. We managed. The next day we spent an hour looking for a nice cheap hotel, we managed to find an expensive cheap hotel. The cracks in the walls and the peeling paint in the moist bathroom made me laugh inside. It was the big gap in the front door that made me nervous. We spent sunday sleeping. Ive been followed home by two creepy guys, one of wich actually knocked on the door after i had ran in and slamed it in his face. One guy has begged me to go have coffee with him having followed me off the metro. And i was nearly peed on. Its good to be back.

"deja vu deja vie"

In Uncategorized on December 19, 2004 at 01:22

My holiday vacation officially started on friday morning when i was woken up by the noise of my employers leaving for the airport. I got up, got dressed, and went to the store for some food and booze. I decided id get drunk just because i could. I waited until 3 to open up my bottle of wine. It did not last nearly as long as i thought it would, and by 3:30 i was telling myself not to open the second one so early. Unfortunately i was perfectly sober again by 5. I wasted the day and wasted the day and wasted the day. I ended up staying awake until 8 am.

sometime around 4 am there was a car accident just outside my building. No real damage to the car that was hit but the car at fault had a nice dented hood. Then around 6:45 it began to snow. it only snowed for 30 min and none of it stuck but it was fun to watch.

which brings me to now..

I was happily sleeping 30 mins ago when suddenly there was a loud bang. I got up and looked outside at the car accident that had just occurred. This one was more serious involving police and handcuffs and tons of fun. And just 5 mins ago i looked out the window to find it snowing once again.

"if you come any closer i’ll stick that figgy pudding up your @$$"

In Uncategorized on December 13, 2004 at 22:48

I have been trying to live my life as if i was over my past and living for a future. This was a bunch of shit. I am most certainly not over much of anything. I have been thinking of this years coming christmas with thoughts of past ones gone. I am finding it hard to look forward to the roasted chicken here in switzerland remembering the roasted chicken and roast potatoes and brussel sprouts i used to have in england. Its hard to get excited about spending my first christmas with my new friends, when i keep wishing i was spending it with the family i adopted like i had been the 4 christmases before. Ive never really felt close to my own family, so i readily adopted the family that seemed to happy to adopt me. It just hurts that much more now that i will never see them nor have any contact with them at all. I feel like they were stolen from me, even though they were never actually mine. I have never been a big fan of the christmas season, but i was just starting to like it, i was understanding why people enjoyed it. It was about family and love and…, and all the things i never really thought i had. And now, im angry to know that someone else has filled the spot that i had. My christmas joy, my christmas family, my christmas love.

"The bunnies inside live without their skin"

In Uncategorized on December 8, 2004 at 13:05

I *A M* O V E R F L O W I N G with b i t t e r n e s s . No feelings of love and joy, hope and understanding, the holiday spirit has passed me by and i am left standing bitter and alone.