Archive for January, 2005|Monthly archive page
You produce toxic thoughts inside my head.
The colours scream your passions, the air breathes out your name.
I shout you into the wind.
Blobs of colour walk through me twisting my mind to your will
But in the silence of darkness i can fear my own thoughts.
and we can’t walk in circles forever.
I now had to face it, growing more conscious at each step of the impression that we ourselves were about to make on the rest of the contemporary world. Only like this could i become aware that what she actually knew of happiness she remembered like a photograph. And above each numbered place in the compartment there was a framed photograph of some death. “They stare at me so coldly now” she thought. She stared straight ahead in silence. How could i have been so wrong?
At the end of the day, alone, and with growing panic in her eyes she studied his face for the first sign of disappointment. She had made no mistake this time in feeling a change in herself. “Don’t you feel it sometimes?” she asked. ” I think I feel it most of the time.” She was lying.
I remember sunsets and warm winter nights beneath the broken skylight.
Can you see me smiling?
Look between the flower beds where the snails lay their eggs. The slime train disapears.
Can you feel me laughing?
The sky is playing violins and the rocks are dancing ’round. But don’t stop spinning yet.
Can you hear me screaming?
I though i was feeling sort of shitty because one year ago today i was dumped. But it seems that i am actually experiencing what people call a hangover. Its my first! *beams* but i feel kind of wimpish as i only had 3 pints of cider, and umm possibly a half a bottle of wine. but really thats nothing!
Most people think in emotions and images more than words. Words distort the meaning of our thoughts. Words come with their own definitions, distortable but not erasable. I think in bold face type. Words rattle around my mind, directions and warning signs for mistakes already made.
My images are blurred and my emotions debilitating. I listen to the words like an emergency radio broadcast.
KEEP RUNNING AND
DON’T LOOK BACK!!!
oh god im drunk. im so drunk i just typoed this line 5 times. but i refuse to pass out and i refuse to go to bed, i smell slike smoke and i dont care wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Its stopped, and is all melty.. 😦